THREE YEARS AND COUNTING...

On November 17, 2011 Peter received his original cancer diagnosis. We have had tough times, ups and downs, and fortunately lots of quality time as a family and wonderful goings-on on the farm since then.  One of those will be happening tonight (see last

paragraph).

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The last time we wrote anything here was in May 2014, on the way home from Peter's scan in Philadelphia --with good news that the tumor had shrunk and should continue to shrink.  The doctor mentioned one tiny spot elsewhere that "was probably nothing," and we headed off to the airport where I thumbed that hasty post that described the doctor as "enthusiastic."

 And then life resumed its busy-ness.  We welcomed our first grandchild (a boy, Levin, born to Jessie and Matt Gladdek) on July 1.  Peter continued all of his volunteer activities and daily swimming.  I signed on to teach Servant Leadership again and also took on a curriculum project with the Episcopal Service Cops.

All of which brought us to the tail end of summer and the 3-month scan on August 4th (report on the 5th).  Peter was in NY visiting him mom and took the train down to Philly.  I flew in from Fayetteville, NC which (who knew?) offered a cheap flight.

We did not meet Dr. Enthusiastic this time.  The tumor had not continued to shrink as predicted, but had grown.  The "probably nothing" spot had grown, too, and three other small sites of metabolic activity had been detected.  The doctor urged chemotherapy and said that he could later "spot weld" (radiate) some of the metastases if necessary.

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I can't see that I ever wrote about our first encounter with Dr. James Tulsky and Duke's Palliative Care Center.  It would have been in late 2013, after the recurrence had been diagnosed and after radiation (at Duke) was taken off of the treatment options.

Thankfully Dr. Tulsky, in his kind, thoughtful, and meticulous style, walked Peter through what chemotherapy-- the only option available at Duke-- could and could not do.  Peter did not choose chemo at that time.  Had he been on those toxic drugs when he developed the pneumonia in January 2014, he well may not have survived that bout.

The events of his month in Philadelphia (February 2014) are all recorded in previous blog entries, all ending with that brief post in May.

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After our return from Philadelphia in August we began meeting with Dr. Tulsky again.  I should give a shout-out to our physician-friend Dr. Sharon Van Horn for putting us in touch with Dr. Tulsky just over a year ago.  Palliative Care is not an end-of-life program, but one to provide guidance and comfort to those diagnosed with serious illness. 

Dr. Atul Gawande's excellent book, Being Mortal, will tell you a lot about Palliative Care and difficult choices.  Dr. Tulsky has guided Peter through the maze of chemotherapy options and has helped him see the realities behind the sometimes vague statements from the oncologist (such as, "It might do some good").

Last week Peter enrolled in Duke's Hospice Care.  These days they recommend that patients enroll very early.  Right after signing on Peter suffered a third bout of aspiration pneumonia.  With the immediate availability of the hospice nurses and Dr. Tulsky, Peter got on the medications he needed quickly, and I have had someone to call with questions about Peter's needs and my caregiving.

"Some people graduate from Hospice," Dr. Tulsky told us.  I am praying that Peter is one of those people.  In the meantime, this is a level of care I've never seen before, an am so grateful that it is available to Peter (to us), and so much of it based in our home.

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Back in September, Peter's mother, Sunny Drimmer, made the trip from NY to NC in one day (down and back) to spend a few hours with her great-grandson, Levin.  Late in October she fell ill  and was hospitalized for a time, but she is now back home in Rye, NY, with home care.  We all have plans/flights to visit her and other family members at Thanksgiving, but we’re not sure as of today if Peter can make it.

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On November 8th Peter performed in the 8th Murphey School Radio Show.  Prior to that his band, Red's Rhythm had a few fun gigs, and last week he had a blast when Ryan Stolp, (son of our friends Janet and Brett) spoke to Peter's Grange meeting about his mountaineering feats. 

Until this week he was counseling patients on Wednesday nights and meeting with his VA writing group on Thursday mornings.  Now he is taking a break from all outside activities until he feels better.

But tonight (20th) we are hosting a return visit by singer-songwriter Heather Maloney here at Down Yonder Farm.  We’ve got lots of help making this happen.  Heather performed here last year with a group called Darlingside, and she immediately became one of my favorite artists.

Life has been really good to us.  We hope that Peter recovers his strength and stamina soon.  Meanwhile, a great deal of rest is called for. However, no doubt that he'll at least make an appearance at the concert tonight.

Talking on the phone is difficult for Peter, as it causes him to cough, and he doesn’t have strength for visitors right now.  I will do my best to keep this blog updated and hopefully he’ll be on the phones and out and about very soon.  

Thanks for all of your love and care.

Susan